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In this midst of this time, I was traveling from Arkansas to Memphis to visit a friend. No force behind it, just a friendly tap. My first stepdad had beat my mom from as far back as I could remember. Take Back The Night I deleted him from my phone, my Facebook, everywhere. I remember throwing youth conferences twice a year that to this day give me chills to recollect — opening service to a church packed full of young people slain, in the floor, crying, worshiping, calling out to God so intensely the choir director said not a soul in there was seated.

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But we regularly found ourselves in the floor, fighting and kicking.

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We started seeing each other every day and eventually moved in together. The guy was there crying. But it took until the earlier part of this year to finally cut him off entirely. He had to approve all my haircuts and clothes. And things kept getting worse. He asked if I was free and sent me an address, telling me to be down for anything. I had to clean up every Friday, cook Sunday through Thursday, work out Monday through Friday… if I broke routine, there was hell to pay.

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A guy in the porn industry started calling about all these roles I would be perfect for. My first stepdad had beat my mom from as far back as I could remember. I had to clean up every Friday, cook Sunday through Thursday, work out Monday through Friday… if I broke routine, there was hell to pay. But not before things got worse. His father came to pick me up, saying my friend was working overtime and would meet me at their house later.

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